Rain, Rain, Rain

I know it has been a while but just haven't felt must like blogging, not that anything is wrong just haven't felt like it. But today I thought I would write a little and update what has been going on.
Well first of all it has been raining soooooo much, maybe that is why I haven't felt like writing, so it has been dark and dreary.
Girls are home from vacation but now Britney is at kid's camp (today is her birthday and I really miss her, she is 10 and this is the first time she has been away on her birthday). It is great to have them home... as they say absence makes the heart grow fonder (lol), no I really love my girls and they are being really good, no fighting or anything like that. Kirsti is having a GREAT attitude and for her that is huge. Ashlee is her normal loving crazy self ( no one is quit like Ashlee).
Guess what... we are moving!!! No not far but we are moving to a beautiful apartment in New Tampa off of Bruce B Downs. It is so nice and I can't wait to move.
Last Sunday at church Pastor Larry preached about help being on the way, boy did that speak alot to me. Tom and I have been struggling for so long and it finally feels like we have caught a break. Getting this apartment means so much to us, I know you may think, why in the world are you so excited about an apartment, well this is such a nice apartment and I can not believe we were approved for it. It is what Tom and I have always wanted and we are finally getting it... Help Is On The Way!!!!!

Thank you God for being there for me... always. Thank you for all of your blessings and your love!!

To My Girls...I Love You!!!

You know how you can hear a song a millions times but never really HEAR it? Well that happened to me today on the way to the store. I have heard this song so many times and I have always loved it but I had never really listened to it and I tell you what when I did the tears started to flow.I had to share it with you all, I hope this songs speaks to you as loudly as it did me.

I want to dedicate this to my 3 girls, you all mean so much to me and no matter what you will always be...

SAFE IN MY ARMS!!!

A Nice Relaxing Saturday...

Today was a very peaceful day. I slept in till about 11:30 and it felt so goooood!!!!

The girls made it back from camp yesterday then they were off to Kentucky, yes I have another 10 days with no kids. I have to say it is nice but I do miss my girls. It is very strange, it is just me and Tom, we have never had any real time alone in our almost 16 years of marriage. We have gone off for weekends away but never any real time alone at home together and it is nice.

I had a ton of laundry to catch up on today and I had to clean up our room ( it was a mess). It felt good to have the time to get in there and clean, I know that may sound weird to some but for me cleaning my room makes me feel good, like I accomplished something, especially when it was as bad as it was.

Well Tom ran to the store to get stuff for dinner (it is also weird jsut cooking for 2), he should be home soon, so I guess I need to go. Not sure what we are having, with Tom you never know.

Looking foward to church tomorrow, God has been moving in some awsome ways in our services lately, can't wait to see what God has instore for us tomorrow.

Love Ya

How do you know that you are doing what God has called you to?

I know this may seem to be a strange question but I think it is one we all struggle with from time to time. I believe that God can call you to different things at different times in your life, but I also believe that your core being never changes.


What do I mean by that, well I believe that if you are called to work with children that you will always work with children in some way. You may start off working with one age group then move to another but I believe you will always have a call to work with children. If you are called to work with women, your heart will always be with women in some way although the specific type of ministry you do may change from time to time.

So what is all of this about....

Every time I feel like I am on the right track and doing exactly what God has called me to something happens to make me doubt my calling. And to be honest I am tired of it, I know what I am called to and I love what I do I am just so sick of doubting myself. I know that it is just Satan trying to distract me but I get so tired of fighting the battle. I see in my mind everything that I want to do, all of the girls' lives I want to make a difference in, all the faces of the girls in this world that need to know how much they are loved by God and I feel so small and insignificant. I feel like there is no way I can do this, what makes me qualified to do all of this, who do I think I am to think I can make a difference. Then God will gently remind me that he does not call the qualified he qualifies the called and that He will give me everything I need to succeed in what He has called me to do.

A person I look up to very much has said on many occasions that if your dreams do not keep you up at night then they are too small, well my keep me up and they scare me to death so I guess I am on the right track, right.

I loved my girls ( I call them all my girls) and I would do anything in the world for them. I thank God everyday that he chose me to teach and guide these precious girls.

I am exactly where God wants me and I can't wait to see the way everything is going to unfold in my life.

*God help me to always remember who I am, I am your chosen, I can make a difference and I am worthy of this call you have put on my life. Thank you God for choosing me.*

Birthdays, Retreats, Parties, and Business Trips...

It has been a crazy week...in the last couples of weeks we have had 4 birthdays and 4 birthday parties , Father's Day, a trip to Stars retreat and Tom is in Georgia for a business trip.

I have not had alot of time to blog or really stop and think but I figured I would drop in a give you a little update on what has been going on. Right now Tom is in Georgia for a business trip, this is the first time in 12 years that he has been gone for more than an over night trip and the girls have not been too excited about it. I do have to admit that it is a little harder than I thought it would be, I guess I have gotten use to him being home. He will get home Friday just in time for Kirsti's 16th birthday party. That is something else that I have going on, a party for Kirsti, I can not believe she is 16, boy time has just flown by. OK, for the rest of the birthdays this month, mine and my two sisters are also in June, so needless to say June is always a busy birthday month for our family.

Last week I also took some girls from church to Stars retreat, they had a blast. It was such an awesome weekend. I think the girls really got a lot out of the services, I know I did.

Well not too much insight or earth shattering stuff just the run down on what has been going on with my life. I will try to catch everyone up on what God has been doing in me lately after I get past all of the craziness.

*Happy Birthday To Me*

Yes today is my birthday and one thing that I have noticed it how your birthdays change over the years.
Let me explain...

*When you are a kid you announce for weeks (some of us months) that our birthday is coming, we want everyone to know. The older you get the quieter the announcing gets, yes you want to feel special on your day but it doesn't seem quit as important as it did before.

*When you are a kid you want gifts from everyone you see that day and at times you even ask what they got for you, you don't wait for them to approach you, you go after them. The older you get the more you appreciate a simple Happy Birthday from those close to you, that more than anything else is what you want, the acknowledgment that it is your "special" day. Don't get me wrong I still love presents but they don't seem quit as important as they did before.

*When you are a kid you can't wait to get up the morning of your birthday(you want your day to start as early as possible) and you try to stay up as late as you can (you want your day to last as long as possible). The older you get the one thing that you would love on your birthday is to be able to sleep in and go to bed early.

Those are just a few of the difference I am experiencing today.

Thank you to all of my dear friends who have wished me a Happy Birthday today. You have given the best gift ever, the gift of your friendship and love!!

Dealing with... CONSEQUENCES!!!

Why do we have to face consequences?!?!?! It hurts! It is not fun...at all!!


Last weekend I had such a huge break through and I felt on top of the world because I knew that Jesus had set me free and I still feel free but now comes the dreaded CONSEQUENCES!!
When we are dealing with issues and people help us through that issue or pray us through that issue we think , wow that is it... it is over I can move on and never have to deal with that again. That is true to an extent but we still do have to face the consequences of our actions. I am not sure why I didn't see this coming, I tell my girls all the time that there are consequences for everything you do so you better be able to deal with them when you make a bad decision. So why did I think I was any different? I had made bad decisions for a long time- did I think I was going to just skate by and not have to deal with my own consequences?
Boy was I wrong!!! I know God is big enough to see me through any situation but man I really don't want to have to go through this. I now have to look at every decision I have made in the past, weather it was to buy a candy bar or buy a new outfit and deal with it. To know that we are in the place we are now because of things that I allowed to control me, and you know what, it really sucks. I know some of it is the devil beating me up over it but lets face it God does give us consequences for our behavior and we have to walk through it weather we like it or not. Yes,I know I am not alone and that God is right there with me but sometimes it sure does feel lonely.
I have a sweet 16 party to throw in a couple of weeks and to be completely honest I don't know how I am going to do it, the money is just not there. But I will do without what ever I have to so I can give her this party.

Consequences... don't ever think you are too old to have to face them!!!